It’s crucial to keep in mind the emotional toll that health problems might take on you. The good news is that you don’t have to go through this alone; you have a full team of people behind you. Not only does treatment restore your body, but it also creates a startling sense of community by bringing people together one by one.
The change starts in the most antiseptic and clinical place. The first nurse who checks your vitals recognizes that you are scared and tries to calm you down by touching you gently. When you talk to her once a week, she remembers what kind of coffee you like and talks about your grandkids. At first, the treatment is professional, but it quickly turns into a real, passionate friendship. These doctors and nurses see you at your most vulnerable, and instead of disregarding it, they are sympathetic. They celebrate your minor wins, such when your blood test results go better, you walk a little farther than normal, or you laugh for the first time in a while.
Instead of having a nurse call you with your test results, Dr. Martinez does it himself. Sarah, your physical therapist, becomes a trusted friend by pushing you just the right amount to help you get better without making you feel too much. It’s not enough for the doctor to be good at what they do; they also need to be kind.
The waiting rooms have their own stories of people who made friends by chance. You sit next to people who get your fears and dreams, and over time, they become your best friends. Maria, who sits next to me during chemo, often brings cookies that she cooked for everyone. Robert, who has his own heart problems, sets organized group walks in the hospital’s outside areas. These other patients really get what you’re going through in a way that other people don’t. They know what it’s like to stay up all night before test results and how good it feels to hear words like “stable” or “getting better.”
Treatment shows you who your real friends are, but it can also help you make new connections in places you didn’t expect. Tom, the neighbor who barely said hello to me before I got sick, now brings me groceries every week and stays for coffee. He tells me about his dad’s condition, and it seems like we’re both trying to connect by being honest and upfront about how we feel. Susan, who is constantly busy, suddenly makes time for long talks where we can talk about what’s bothering us. When something bad happens, it’s like peeling back layers to find the real, deep concern underneath.
The ramifications of those ripples go far further than you might think. Your daughter’s college pal sends care packages containing your favorite tea. Your coworker’s wife, who you don’t know well, delivers you meals with encouraging notes. The cashier at your neighborhood pharmacy starts putting aside new magazines that she thinks you’ll like. Each little thing you do adds another strand to your web of compassion.
Families fluctuate a lot, and connections grow and alter over time. When things get tough, your sister, who is usually busy as an executive, learns to relax with you. Your teenage nephew, who is always on his phone, sends you funny memes to make you smile. Your partner learns that they are stronger than they believed and gets better at asking for help. Treatment makes it easier for everyone around you to give and get care.
It’s not merely easy to put together this care team; it takes honesty and bravery. You need to be clear about what you need and let other people help you. It’s about being okay with being terrified, asking for a ride when driving is too much, and saying yes to dinner when someone asks you. It’s about being honest when things are hard and enjoying the good times when they arrive.
One of the best things about putting together your care team is seeing how caring flows both ways, like a two-way street. While other people help you through therapy, you also give back in a big way: you have the ability to change someone’s life for the better. Your neighbors really like helping others, your doctors are inspired and motivated to do their jobs again, and patients who have similar health problems often create profound bonds that go beyond their own problems.
A lot of these ties are still strong years later. The nurse is now a friend you send holiday cards to, patients celebrate birthdays and other important occasions together, and neighbors are still neighbors, but they now have a better respect for how lovely and valuable life is. Treatment may have brought us together at first, but real care is what keeps us together over time.
We believe in demonstrating love when someone is going through a tough moment, which is why your care staff is there. Letting someone take care of you gives them a chance to feel important and helpful. Healing isn’t just about restoring bodies; it’s also about being nice and understanding to
